Adoption

I think I have stated on here that several of our friends are fostering or adopting, or both.  I have great respect for them.  With our family already having four kids close together, it's not in the cards for us right now to take on another child.  I work with a child that has gone through the foster system, and sure he's hyperactive, but he can read fairly well (but apparently not quite at grade level), and he seems like he's adjusting fairly well.  It's not until you try to talk to him about how things are going does he get defensive and shut down.  Some other people we know are waiting to go get their son, but the country is closed to adoption, so they can't get in country to bring him home.  My heart just wouldn't be able to bear the constant up and down of emotions.  I've gone through enough of that in my pregnancies, and we can't go through that again for a while.

I think what God wants us to do is to be open to Him.  Be receptive to His leading and obey what He says.  We feel it's best to not get pregnant right now, but that doesn't mean in a few years we would ignore God's instruction to expand our family, either by a child of our own or an adoption, I can't say. It breaks my heart to hear about children, not just orphans, who don't get to go to school, or don't have money for food.  I feel like I should care for them all, but know it's not reasonable for our family right now.

We are called as Christians to care for the widows and orphans, but that doesn't mean we will have them running all through our home. We keep praying about adoption, but we aren't there yet, and we may never be.

I have a heart for families with young children, but have to be content with my place now. My mother-in-law helps young families as often as she can. I keep praying that when my kids are older I will be able to do the same for the young families around me. I can't be if much help other than encouraging and praying for young and new moms while I have 4 little ones running around.

Parenting

So have you seen those kids in public who throw a knock down drag out tantrum?  You know the ones, usually 2-3 years old and the mothers are desperately trying to get them to stop throwing a fit and embarrassing her and themselves in public.

Well, I've been one of those parents dealing with a kid throwing a public tantrum lately, only the child of mine throwing the fit is five and a half.  I'm usually worried about if they think I'm trying to steal her or if I'm abusing her.  I do my best not to look at anyone for fear of the stares or comments coming my way.  Last Saturday at the game she asked to come off the field to go to the bathroom.  After coming off she refused to go, so I carried her, the ENTIRE way to the bathroom, and she grunted at me for several minutes in the bathroom before she relaxed enough to go to the bathroom.  At practice earlier this week, she threw a fit and refused to do what she was asked to do during a drill, so I made her sit in the stroller facing the baseball fields until she calmed down (it didn't take too long), and she was allowed to return to practice.

Today...oh today...she was warned because of her behavior in previous games that if she threw a fit she wouldn't get to go back in the game.  She started grunting and then she started screaming and stomping and flailing her arms about.  I tried to put her in the stroller to give her a chance to calm down, but she escaped and continued screaming, so we tried to leave.  I carried her all the way back to the car while pushing the stroller.  Thankfully my sister-in-law was there to carry Nathan to the car.  I set her down in the car, my SIL let my 3 y.o. in the car, I buckled my 1 y.o. in his seat, and closed the door.  She was still throwing a fit when I shut the door, but she can't get out of the vehicle without going out the front door.  For the record, she rode the whole way home with no seat belt on because I refused to pin her down to attempt to put her belt on. Today was probably her biggest fit in a while. I took her uniform off, put her on the potty and left her to put the other 2 in bed. When I came back, she had put her uniform on, went to the bathroom in a different bathroom than I put her in, so I took her uniform off again carried her to her room, put on her pajamas and diaper (yes diaper.  She doesn't stay dry during the day, who expects her to stay dry at night?) and put her in bed. She got up once and got in trouble because she was still mad, but got up a short time later crying a sad cry.  I got her pillow and her blanket (I figured with all the energy she used throwing the fit, I think she needed some comfort), kissed her, told her "I love you," and put her back to bed.  Thankfully, I haven't heard from her since.

Usually passersby are either saying or thinking "Bless her heart" while others are sitting there judging them for letting their children behave like that.  Don't they discipline them.  Sadly, I am guilty of the latter on occasion. Though, because of being one of those moms dealing with a tantrum on occasion, you would think I would have more compassion and understanding toward those who are in the trenches of a stubborn child. I have been trying to be more considerate, but only after my knee-jerk negative reaction to whatever situation I come across.  Being loving is something I struggle with, but I am working on it.  Swallowing my pride is something else that needs work, but, maybe later.